It’s the most controversial time of the year; February. A month filled with flowers, chocolates, oversized plush bears, and hearts everywhere you look. For some, it’s an exciting opportunity to shower the one they love, but for others, it can be a somber reminder of what they haven’t yet found; a partner.
Of course, not everyone hates being single. According to a survey by the Pew Research Center, a whopping 50% of all single people say they are quite content, and we are here for it.1 This post is for the other 50% that are ready to find love.
The movies make it seem so easy, don’t they? Of course, that person you bumped into at the coffee shop happens to be attractive, established, single, and ready for commitment. Naturally, the one who found your lost dog is also looking for love and conveniently your type. Meanwhile, you feel like the only time you have chance encounters is when you run into your plumber at the grocery store.
When you’re actively trying to find a partner, it feels like everyone is striking gold all around you while you’re still hitting the dirt. Similar to the idea that “what you focus on expands,” you begin to notice couples everywhere you look, almost as if they were hired to follow you around the city and shove their love in your face. So, what do you do? If all the apps, setups from family members, and checklists on what you want in a partner seem to go nowhere, take a break from the hunt to reflect, reframe your mindset, and reconnect with yourself.
You are already whole; you just might need a little reminder. This is the time to prioritize the hell out of yourself, try new things, work on your own health goals, and explore the world around you. Human beings are made for connection, but those relationships do not need to be romantic in order to be fulfilling. Get involved in ways that will bring you closer to yourself and others. Be curious and exploratory. Remember when you took that ceramics course in high school that you loved? Why not sign up for some pottery classes in your community? Have you always wanted to learn how to cook like Gordan Ramsey? Go and take a cooking class! Join a book club, check out the virtual meetup options in your area, and find a place nearby to hold all the puppies you can wrap your arms around. Or how about getting into the weight room to work on some awesome strength goals? If you can’t get to the Body Bloom Gym in San Francisco, you can always use the Body Bloom App to get your customized training program remotely. You don’t need to wait for Mr. or Mrs. Right to start living your life. Adventure is already at your fingertips.
You don’t have complete control over the moment when you’ll meet someone special, so be open! It could be in a week, a month, or a year from now. You could even stumble upon them in the most unlikely place, find them in an already established friendship, or seek them out through a website. Whatever the case, you should still be able to enjoy life. You have everything you need inside of you, and when someone special shows up, you’ll have one hell of a story, and life, to share with them.
- Brown, A. 2020. Nearly Half of U.S. Adults Say Dating Has Gotten Harder for Most People in the Last 10 Years. Pew Research Center. Retrieved from https://www.pewresearch.org/social-trends/2020/08/20/nearly-half-of-u-s-adults-say-dating-has-gotten-harder-for-most-people-in-the-last-10-years/